Book Report

[stormkeeper_lovesall]

 

Yet another book report. Because I haven't been writing enough fic. And every book on this report gets an 8 or above because they all were awesome. 

I Came All This Way to Meet You by Jami Attenberg – I’ve read several books by this novelist and although none of them are historical fiction, I love them. Her fiction is page-turning and insightful and filled with “yes!” and “oh interesting” moments. So here is her memoir. And once again, I can’t pinpoint what exactly makes this so good. I don’t know. She’s very forthcoming. It’s nice to just read about this flawed, creative, real human. Grade: 8 

Acceptance by Emi Nietfeld – Another fascinating memoir. The author’s mother – and her only real parent – is neglectful and lives in a “dirty” hoarding house.  So Nietfeld needs help and neither her mother nor “the system” is doing much to give her the foundation she needs. She bounces from institutions to foster homes to her mom’s to being homeless to staying with an abusive boyfriend and back. A few things stuck out for me in this memoir. One – and I think this is one of the author’s main points – is that the fault was always considered to be her own. Rarely if ever was she recognized as the victim of neglectful parenting. Instead she was told over and over again to change her mindset, to take responsibility, to aim high. And she’s a child! I remember a college Anthropology teacher who said that in the US we tend to blame individuals, not institutions. Some folks might read of Neitfeld’d childhood and say ‘wow what a bitch that social worker was’ when truly the fault is a culture that has endless money to spend on “defense” while we overwork and underpay the people who are supposed to help kids. Another eye-opener for me was a comment someone made about her foster parents. Unsurprisingly, her foster parents are….not great. They provide food and shelter, but they call Michaelangelo’s David “pornographic”, they don’t want Nietfeld hanging out with artists or aiming for AP classes. But as someone once told her, ‘Boho, open-minded people don’t become foster parents’. Sad but true. And of course another telling moment is when the author tracks down several girls she knew from institutions who were in similar places, and none are really doing ok mentally or financially. Grade: 8

 

Barn 8 by Deb Olin Unferth – This is a contemporary, off-kilter novel full of dry wit and heart and pain. A young woman decides to hop on a bus to meet the father she’s never known. She ends up in Iowa and then ends up working at an egg farm, and ultimately gets involved in a plot to free the hens from their misery. I die a little bit at sections like this one, describing the work of an undercover investigator at an egg farm: “12 hour days placing the baby-soft beaks of chicks into hot iron guillotines, searing off the tips while the chicks struggled and their faces smoked. Hens. Sweet little puffs.” But the book doesn’t preach veganism for 300 pages; it is a well-written, ingenious, and even hopeful novel. Grade: 8

 

The Light We Carry by Michelle Obama – You expect any book by either Obama to be good. I went in with high expectations. And man, Obama did not disappoint! I was chatting about this book with someone and she asked what I liked about it. I said I liked that it’s very practical and useful. Obama’s first book was a memoir. This one is more like advise from your very smart and very worldly aunt. (Yes, I know she’s only 9 years older than I). The subtitle is “overcoming in uncertain times”, and if you think you could use some help in that area, then this book is for you. Grade: 8

 

Everyone In This Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austin – Holy shit. I read this book in one day. It tore me down and built me back up. I cried at the ending. What’s it about? I will just quote from the front cover. “Meet Gilda. She cannot stop thinking about death. Desperate for relief from her anxious mind and alienated from her repressive family, Gilda responds to a flyer for free therapy at a local Catholic church where Father Jeff assumes she’s there for a job interview. Caught off guard and too embarrassed to correct him, Gilda is abruptly hired…..(even though) she’s queer and atheist.” Simply brilliant and quite a tour through Gilda’s mind and world. Grade: 9

Comments

[megan_moonlight]

I'm so jealous of the amount of books you read. I tried to read more books this year, but most of what I ended up reading were fics.

I'm definitely curious about The Light We Carry and Everyone In This Room Will Someday Be Dead, so I'll definitely add them to my to-read list.

Happy New Year! 💖

[stormkeeper_lovesall]

I've been just devouring books last 2 months. I know I am lucky that even despite my job, I still usually have a lot of free time. Hope you like the 2 books!

Have a wonderful New Year!

[nytshd3]

I agree that it's hard to pinpoint what makes a memoir good and enjoyable. Usually when they suck it's because they need more editing, so maybe since she was already a novelist (and presumably has an editor), that helps with it. Really nice that it was a good read!

Several years ago I was friends with a woman online who had a husband and a son and decided she wanted to become a foster parent. SHe and her husband ended up fostering two brothers for... I'm not sure, a year and a half? 2 years? The kids were something like 18 months and 3 years when she got them and in all the time they were with them, it was a constant uphill battle with a shitton of therapy (physical and mental), daily meltdowns and physically destructive behavior, dealing with tons of agencies and a lot of useless or at least unhelpful workers in the system, etc. She would say there were occasional good days and good times but she and her husband and their son were constantly stretched to the breaking point, etc. Last time she posted an update, her husband had become a full blown alcoholic, they were in the process of separating, and she was still trying to hold it together for their son and their two foster boys, who the system kept saying was going to return them to their mother (who had since had another kid, as had their father with a different woman) but kept putting it off and the mother had even suggested that maybe she could give her new kid to my friend to foster for a while as well. She stopped posting after that. I hope she's OK and things worked out but that was with two little kids, I can only imagine how much more would be needed to properly care for an older child who had been through so much. And that's not even mentioning that the kids' father threatened them on multiple occasions ('I'm going to come fuck you up for taking my kids from me' kind of stuff). I imagine people telling Nietfeld to take responsibility and aim high know that even in a best case scenario in the system, she's unlikely to get the help she ACTUALLY needs. Plus there's so much emphasis in this country to pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, it's sad but true that the onus is dumped on a child to figure it out for themselves.

Someone else told me they loved Barn 8!

Hey, depending on the size of the family, an aunt could be just 9 years older than you :) Plus if anyone could be described as smart and very worldly, it's freakin Michelle Obama! Also love it when there's practical and useful advice in books like this, all the 'rah rah rah' in the world doesn't help if it's not something you can actually apply.

I would have been likely to steer away from Everyone in this room will someday be dead because i would have been afraid it would end up with 'and then the atheist realized that god is awesome and she decided to repent for her sins and become a nun'. Glad to hear it's not that!

Thanks for sharing as always!

[stormkeeper_lovesall]

Amen on foster care. Part of me really wishes I could help. But I can't imagine it, for all the reasons you said.

Yes, I swear Everyone In This Room was truly awesome. No worries about any repenting. :)